The signs were clearly there in front of my eyes. My son Danny, at the age of four, ever so slightly walking on the tips of his toes. My heart sank. This was proof the disease challenging me daily would now also be his struggle. What I didn’t realize then is that God had prepared me for this very moment, building me up for a special task.
We all have hardships that can define us for the better, making us stronger, and overtime, giving us wisdom that’s meant to share. This often takes viewing the challenges we face not as a negative, but rather a positive.
When we are willing to see our struggles in life as a mechanism for growth, we can truly help others in similar situations. This is a special part of God’s healing power – that whatever hardships we face, God will use for our own good, and also the wellbeing of others.
“We know that all things work together for the good of those who love God: those who are called according to His purpose.”
Romans 8:28 HCSB
“All things” includes the good and the bad and whatever is in between. If we allow God to work through us for His glory, then every single difficulty has the chance to turn into a learning lesson that can assist another down the line.
Hardships Have A Greater Purpose
God surely uses the difficulties we face for a much bigger reason than we can imagine.
This whole concept took me quite a while to grasp, because I let the weight of worry override any sort of knowledge I had gained over the years being disabled.
To explain, I have Hereditary Spastic Paraplegia, a rare disease that is progressive. I had the capability of walking when I was in grade school, but overtime, as my muscles got weaker and tighter due to spasticity, I could barely maintain an independent gait pattern.
Through every single experience growing up, God was teaching me what it means to truly depend on inner strength. I just didn’t know it at the time.
So, when doctors confirmed Danny’s diagnosis as the same disease, my mind went straight to the negative:
All of the terrible, embarrassing, and painful experiences I have lived will now be Danny’s, I thought.
Every single worse case scenerio crossed my mind, because that’s what I knew. I pictured Danny falling at school just as I had, kids making fun of him as they did me, and then the onset of depression as his leg muscles deteriote like mine did, leaving an overall feeling of anxiety and unworthiness.
Not only did these thoughts leave me in an anxious state for quite some time, but I was losing an opportunity to guide Danny in a way that would build his strength emotionally. I couldn’t see beyond my own fears.
God always finds a way though. He truly does!
Let God In To Help Make Changes
Several years later as my son prepared for spinal cord surgery, both Danny and I were invited to church.
In that first meeting, I could feel the presence of God surrounding us in comfort and community during the most stressful time of our lives.
As I drove away after the heartwarming service, God clearly stated to me that everything was going to change.
In no way was this God saying that He was going to make life easier for me or Danny.
Actually, God was challenging me. If my heart was going to be open to God, I had to let go of my fears and start making changes in every area of my life, including motherhood.
First, that meant seeing the good in every challenge and accepting that Danny’s story was not going to be the same as mine. Yes, he is going to face hardships, but God has a plan for Danny that is unique. My role as a mom is to support Danny through any challenges he may face and help him build his inner strength by trusting God.
Another aspect I had to let go of was fault. I blamed myself for passing along the disease. These thoughts are definitely not from God though.
This was revealed to me when I read how the disciples wondered if a blind man’s sin or that of his parents had caused the blindness. Jesus explains that it was not due to fault or sin.
“This came about so that God’s works might be displayed in him.”
John 9:3 HCSB
God’s plan is that His greatness will be shown through each of us as we overcome every battle by trusting Him, depending on Him, and then sharing His name to all we encounter.
Being an example and sharing God’s light has everything to do with how we carry ourselves.
As my pastor explained in a recent sermon:
“Your life is speaking. Good or bad, your life is speaking.”
Pastor Mauricio Ruiz
Our life can either speak strength and perseverance to those around us or our life can speak fear and anxiety.
Share What God Has Shown You
I have decided to speak strength and perseverance into my son’s life. No matter how difficult the moment, I encourage him to push forward trusting God to help him stay strong emotionally, so he can face the physical trials.
God is always with you. He is not going to leave you to face any battle alone. Depend on Him. Lean On Him.
This is what I often tell Danny when the disease feels overwhelming or he experiences a setback.
I can’t deny there is still a part of me that remains scared when Danny goes about his day, even as a young adult now, because I know it’s going to be tough. But then, I remind myself of all the moments God has been there for me. He has never left me.
Gracefully, the Lord has carried me through the most trying moments of my life.
For every single fall, there has been comeback. For every single embarrassment, there has been a new level of toughness. For every moment of depression and loneliness, there has been ten times more love and comfort from the Father. That is the Lord’s goodness flipping anything meant to hurt me into something empowering.
Here lies the wisdom I need to share with Danny.
“Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
Joshua 1:9 HCSB
God Is Building You Up To Help Others
With all of this in mind, I think of those who are looking at hurdles wondering how they will ever make it over to the other side. You might question again, how can illness be a positive? How can depression or anxiety ever turn into something good?
The Lord wants to guide you through it all so you can stand strong and be an example of His strength and love.
We must continue on with a new viewpoint that allows for growth.
“… we also rejoice in our afflictions, because we know that affliction produces endurance, endurance produces proven character, and proven character produces hope.”
Romans 5:3 HCSB
Through the teachings of Jesus you will find the hope needed to move forward and before you know it you’ll be passing along that hope to someone else.
I share with you what I know to be true …
God is with you. I know it’s hard, but keep going. Don’t give up. The Lord has made you as an example of strength and you can make a difference for others. God is building you up for a special task.
Please let me know if I can pray for you in any way.
DEDICATED TO JESUS
A Journey of Faith
My favorite post yet
Beautiful words, amazing. Well done.
Thank you so much 🙂
Thank you for all the support 🙂
This was wonderful. Your blogs are so on key with what others are going through. They have helped me tremendously especially during the past months which have been challenging. And Zi am so blessed to have such a beautiful friend who supports me in every way.